Win at Win-Win
Happy Thursday! You made it!
When I talk to parents about cooperation, they often ask, “Why are we talking about cooperating with our kids? Shouldn’t they cooperate with us?”
This is– honestly– a fair question.
More than once, I have wondered why it was my job as a child to cooperate with the grown-ups, but now that I’m a grown-up, it’s somehow STILL my job to cooperate with my kids. Where’s the part where someone cooperates with me?
In my finer moments, I recognize that this thinking sets up a zero-sum situation: for me to win, my kid has to lose. If they win (and all parents want their children to win!), then I’m the loser. Not ideal.
But what if we cooperated with our kids to create win-win situations? As adults, it’s our job to set this up; in doing so, we model the kind of cooperation we want to see in the world.
Tip of the Week: I love to play a game with myself in which I take a parent-child situation that seems zero-sum (meaning, whatever is lost by one side is gained by the other) and see if I can turn it into a win-win situation in which both parties are allied against the problem. It’s not as hard as you’d think! Check out this Instagram post for an example.
Resource of the Week: If you have a baby or young child and haven’t discovered that author Sandra Boynton also writes music, this delightful playlist is for you.
Want to explore how I can help parenting make sense, even when no one is cooperating? Reach out!
You’ve got this,
Cari
One more thing– Please forward this to any other parents who might love some short, sweet, and useful weekly parenting tips! (If you got this from a friend, good job for having such thoughtful people looking out for you! Please head over to my website to check it out, or click here to sign up for the weekly newsletter.)
